Sunday, August 8, 2010

Grandpa survivalist

http://bisonsurvivalblog.blogspot.com/2010/04/grandpa-survivalist.html
Bison Survival Blog Friday, April 23, 2010

GRANDPA SURVIVALIST
To those who skip the comments section in fear that my minions will be posting weak imitations of my wit and wisdom and can’t be bothered with such foolishness, let me repeat my profuse apologies for the late posting Wednesday. I had auto-posted it and the computer failed to put it up at 7 AM. When you schedule a post ahead of time you put the date and time and then it is on auto. But if you were not finished writing or hadn’t yet scheduled it then it is saved as a draft. For some reason, I can only speculate that it is directed at me personally, it will sometimes go from scheduled to draft all on its own. Then, if I don’t double check in the morning it doesn’t post. Wednesday I forgot to check, sorry. Thursday it did the same thing, and although I tried to check it the Internet connection was screwy. A few snowflakes and our high-tech tenuous hold to the outside is in danger. On other business, I’ve noticed I’ve been drifting towards longer articles. I had been shooting for a thousand words and noticed it lately at 1200. I’m obviously so in love with the sound of my own words that I’ve taken the extra 15 minutes of lunch I now have and used it to write more. I’ll have to watch that. Pretty soon you will get spoiled again and I need to keep you at the cusp between excitement and non-expectant. Today will be on the short side as I’m going to try to publish my most excellent yet underappreciated masterpiece “Life After The Collapse” in paper form. I hesitated this long as it was $100 to buy a ISBN number for publishing. Now, Lulu.com is waiving that fee. If you are too tight to buy a copy in e-book or paper, I have the first quarter of the book posted at my web site for free. I think it brilliantly spells out why we won’t avert a collapse, but then I’m a bit prejudiced.
A minion asked me to address the question of how you can weather the collapse if you are of advanced years. If you are pretty much anything over seventy you have fewer options, but it certainly isn’t impossible. I thought this would be a good topic to cover as I am no where near old but I certainly am no spring chicken. Even the most optimistic certainly will agree that by 2035 we will see oil at a mere 25% of present use. Even if we somehow avoid catastrophe until then it will be a very different world where human and animal muscle does all the work now done by machines. That will not be a great time to be old and feeble. I myself will be seventy years old. If the stress from too many ex-wives doesn’t blow out my heart by then, most certainly it will be one of my asshat readers that tries to kill me off by raising my blood pressure. But even if I escape that fate, seventy years old will be a trial. Obviously I’ll still be riding a bike then as gasoline will be several hundred dollars a gallon ( I’m speaking as if things haven’t collapsed-which of course is simply foolish but I’m catering to the Cassandra’s at this point, just a little change of pace to appease all those exposed to my nuggets of wisdom ) when you can get it by lottery. That will keep me in reasonable shape for that age. The only worries should be a weak sphincter from all the years of holding back loose stools from the all vegetable diet I’ve been forced to embrace as meat is as expensive as gasoline. I’ll be dribbling as I’m peddling.
Obviously, old age hundreds of years ago isn’t the same as now. And our average age will shrink in the decades ahead. But there were still plenty of old bastards back in the day, even if 80 was about the max compared to 100 today. Obviously being old isn’t a hindrance survival wise if you plan ahead for it. You just put yourself in the position where younger folk act as your muscles and eyes. But you must have something to offer in return other than experience ( which is invaluable except that youngun’s think they don’t need it ). Right now I would be taking the filthy lucre you got from my Social Security tax and investing it in bribing younger people during the collapse. Not any stranger off the street but family or trusted acquaintances that have not prepared. You prepare for them in return for a strong group. This obviously goes against your grain, as the worthless pukes are getting a free lunch at your expense. But, hey, you are old and feeble and have no choice. And of course, once they eat your food they will still complain if you don’t do something, so you better have a skill they need. Chemistry or engineering or something. It isn’t fair, but neither is getting old before you can enjoy wisdom.
Before you get too old, but old enough to start slowing down, you can still go the lone wolf route. But you must be in good shape, and strenuously practice preventive medicine, as well as being fully stockpiled and having backup plans for everything. For instance, not just wood heat but an earth bermed shelter in case you can’t haul much wood anymore. Getting old sucks, and an old survivalist must work twice as hard to get things done. But until we are back in a solar economy with three generational households where the old are welcomed for their skill at raising and training the next generation, you are on your own. Plan on that, just as you should be planning on your SS check being inflated away to spit. END
The Official Bison Web Site http://www.bisonpress.com/

1 comment: